Random Drabbles
Title: Not Ready. (Drabble)
Author: liketostopthen
Paring: Ry/Col. It does have some Col/Deb in it to I guess.
Rating: I use the 'F' word, but apart from that I don't think it's too naughty. So PG-15 ish or something?
Summary: Deb's POV. "I shouldn't have come here".
Notes: Thanks again to Lucy who looked over this for me. She's wonderful and is my courage! :).
Feedback would make my week, whatever you want to say I would love to hear it.
I shouldn't have come here.
I knew when I followed him that he wasn't going where he said he was. I knew as he stood and smiled and lied to me, that he didn't have a meeting with his agent. I knew instead that it was Ryan that was waiting for him.
I had always known there was something between them and it was something that I couldn't reach, couldn't touch and couldn't wipe away with kisses and touches and commitments, however much I tried.
But I didn't know it was this.
I had thought, hoped even, that it was just a strong friendship. Deep down I had always been ready to deal with the thought that they even spent nights together, comfort in fucking.
When I had watched him lie to me for what felt like the hundredth time, the curiosity had finally snapped and spread through my body and I had needed to find out what it was they shared. I thought I could deal with it.
But I wasn't ever ready for this.
As I watched them through the open doorway, both oblivious to my presence, I knew I couldn't compete with this. This was something stronger, something powerful, something overwhelmingly beautiful that the pain caught in my throat and I felt my heart shatter at the thought that I had never experienced anything like it. As they touched and caressed, their eyes never separating as they lost themselves in each other, I suddenly felt suffocated.
I thought I had been ready for the sight of them together. But this wasn't harsh and frantic and it wasn't purely sexual, tension relieving. No this was different. This I couldn't deal with.
This was love.
Random Drabbles
Random Drabbles- Various Pairings, I had certain ones in mind, but pick your own! J
1. Pick any character(s) or pairing(s) you like.
2. Turn on your music player and put it on random/shuffle.
3. Write a drabble related to each song that plays. You only have the time frame of the song to finish the drabble; you start when the song starts, and stop when it's over. No lingering afterwards!
4. Do ten of these, then post them.
Rest Stop by Matchbox20
He looked at me and I just knew.
He couldn't do this anymore. Because he didn't love me. Not like he loved him.
I felt my heart shatter and break, crack into little shards that split my insides. I was broken.
He looked at me like he cared, gave me a damn pitying look, of all things, like he wasn't telling me it was over, like he wasn't telling me he didn't want me, like he wasn't sticking a knife in my gut and twisting it.
I tried to block it out.
I concentrated on the sounds coming in through the window, the traffic outside, the glint from the starlight.
I tried to think of anything but him. Didn't look at him, speak to him. Didn't dare let the tears fall that wanted to fall.
He stared at me for a long moment, still with that 'I care' look, even though he didn't.
If he did he wouldn't have done this to me.
Then he left me alone.
-
Drops Of Jupiter by Train
It had been years. Two, maybe three, maybe even four.
Not once had he even attempted to see me.
I tried, once, to see him, but then I gave up. I couldn't do it. Not how things were left.
He wanted time to find himself. Time away from me. Time with his perfect family in his perfect house where he could pretend that everything was fucking perfect and that he wasn't hiding. That he was doing exactly what he wanted to do, exactly where he wanted to be.
And for a while I believed it.
I let myself believe that it was true and he didn't want to be with me. That he could live without me, like I was trying to do without him.
Until I saw him again.
One look in his eyes and I saw all those feelings that I knew were reflecting in my own eyes.
-
Someday by Nickelback
Forty years.
Forty fucking years and we were still playing the same game, still tiptoeing around each other and our feelings.
Forty years of pretending that we didn't love each other, didn't crave each other, didn't want to run away from our perfect lives with each other.
Forty years of telling each other that the time wasn't right. That it would ruin things.
Forty years of not wanting to hurt other people, not wanting to break peoples hearts when we were letting our own break every day.
Forty years of saying someday. Saying that someday we would give in, that we'd stop this game, rewrite this story, give ourselves our happy ending.
But even after forty years, as we stood, smiling at each other across the room, we both knew that someday wouldn't come.
-
Happiness by Orson
Do I really need a reason?
It seems like I should, because we'd been friends and neither of us had considered this before. And I know as I watched him that he wasn't sure what to think, that he didn't know where this was coming from, that he wasn't sure whether to believe me or not.
His eyes were a question, asking me, begging me to tell him how he was supposed to react. And I wondered for a second if that look was because he didn't feel the same way and he didn't know how to tell me.
But then he smiled, and he leaned over to kiss me and I guess that look was because he did feel the same way, but he didn't know whether to believe me.
I'm glad he did.
-
Statue by Low Millions
She opens the door. I can only tell because of the click it makes, the sound so loud in the quiet room.
She's looking down at me. I can see her boot out of the corner of my eye.
I don't look at her, I'm not sure I even know how to move my head anymore. She towers over me and I see her face. It's not like I remember it.
She's blocking the ceiling. I can't count the tiles anymore, can't see the lines that I was staring at. I can't continue with my distraction and I feel the tears behind my eyes once more.
She's wearing black. I can see her clothes now, all black, and it doesn't suit her. Her skin suddenly looks too pale.
"It's today." She tells me.
I can't move though. I'm just staring, laying on the floor, frozen here. The phone is still lying by my hand where I dropped it when I received the call, before I had collapsed here.
She crouches down near me. I can't look at her anymore. I don't want to.
Because she's not him.
And because he's gone.
-
Iris by Goo Goo Doll
The room is dark, it's dank and it's cold and it never used to matter.
It's a run-down dive of a place and it's hidden away and it's the only place we could go where no one would care who we were.
Where no one cares who I am.
I am alone this time. Sat in the room by myself and I can't face to be anywhere else right now.
The sheets beneath me feel strange, uncomfortable against my jeans, yet I have felt them on bare skin before and they were soft and comforting.
The room isn't how I remembered. Yet I guess I never paid much attention before.
Curled close together with him, wrapped in his arms, it had felt perfect, felt safe.
Now it feels unusual and unreal and yet I still want to hide here, away from the world.
Because only this place can understand, this is the only place that saw us together, properly together.
And so I'll hide here, away from people I don't want to face, away from a world I don't want to face.
And missing the man that should be here next to me.
-
Lucky by Bif Naked
I watched them, laughing together, arms touching.
They smiled much wider with each other, their jokes together funnier than anyone else’s. They held eye contact a bit longer than necessary and they'd use any excuse to touch, a casual arm around the shoulder, a touch on the hand, pressing together for any reason, stolen kisses, fake, in front of a crowd, but real enough.
I watched them, as they left each other and went back to their happy families, their smiles still in place, but just a tiny bit smaller since they parted.
One last glance across the room at each other, and then they go back to where they belong.
I watched them, always wondering if they stole more time together, if there was something else behind the looks, the wanting, the clear chemistry that tied them together.
When I found out there wasn't, I was surprised, shocked, but more saddened than anything else.
I stole time together with him, with my version of their love, with the one I glanced too long at and found excuses to touch. Excuses we didn't need to use, because we never separated, we never pretended, we left everyone else and disappeared together.
I watched them, and I realised how lucky I was.
-
Over My Head by The Fray
They are all looking at me. Waiting.
Everyone except him, I realise.
He is looking down, looking around, looking everywhere except at me.
I glance over at him, not lingering too long, but it's long enough that I'm sure someone noticed. Sure everyone must've noticed.
I wonder how I got here, how I came to be standing here as everyone stares at me, waiting for me to say the words, to make the commitment, to finally dispel all those rumours that already circulate around our friends. How we spend to much time together, how maybe there is something more going on.
In a few seconds though, once I say the words, all those whispers will stop. Because men who are in love with their best friends don't get married.
I don’t want to do this, I realise. I want to stop but I'm in too deep. It's too late.
So as he doesn't look at me and as I pretend I didn't just look at him, I focus on her in front of me and I say quietly, "I do."
-
Indie Rockin' by Common Rotation
I'm a live wire, bouncing around on stage, playing my air guitar, words spilling from my mouth as I try to keep up.
I'm improvising, the words coming out are well thought out yet completely out of my control as I quickly make up the songs.
I get the laughs, they smile at me, and I take an exaggerated bow.
There's no stopping me, not their quiet words, not their laughs, not their jokes together that I am separate from.
Backstage politics, rumours and kisses, friendships and rejections, none if it matters.
Not right now, here on stage, this is where I am meant to be. Whatever they say.