None But the Broken Hearts
Title: None But the Broken Hearts
Pairing: Ryan/Colin
Rating: PG
Summary: Valentine Fluff
Disclaimer: This is dedicated to my very special friend Lauryn! Higgles to you my dear:)(I better get myself out of this mode soon before I get typecast...grrrr...BRING ME ANGST!!!) I hope it brings everyone some warm fuzzies for the day!!
Colin sat in his seat, under the bright lights of the set and heaved an almost inaudible sigh. He was staring at nothing in particular, just the myriad of people who had found their way into the taping of another episode of Whose Line. His shoulders slumped slightly. It was that time of year again, he thought and the blanket of depression settled over him wrapping him in its familiar confines, smothering him the way a boa constrictor tightens on its prey, ever so unnoticeable until it's too late.
Next to him seemingly oblivious to all, was his best friend of almost 20 years, trying his very best to maintain his patience for something that just didn't hold the same charm as it used to. He fidgeted in his seat. He bounced his leg. He impatiently played with his water glass for the umpteenth time. He had more important things on his mind. He glanced over surreptitiously at Colin and took note of his downcast demeanor. He shook his head and ran a hand through his hair. 'What could he do?' Hopefully by the end of this evening, things would be a little brighter for his melancholy friend. On that note he smiled, that almost Cheshire cat grin, and settled back for another hit or miss session of madness.
Colin performed flawlessly, although he chastised himself for his own recognized distraction. He just didn't feel it. It had been almost two years since he and Deb divorced, but to Colin, the pain seemed as fresh and as real as if it had happened yesterday. Valentine's Day only made things worse for him. He was a true romantic, and every year he looked forward to sharing that romantic time with the one he loved. He felt hollow and empty inside, like there was a hole to fill and no one would ever come close to replacing what he lost. His eyes filled with tears at that last thought as he returned to his seat and began fiddling with his fingers in that compulsive habit he had formed many, many years ago.
Ryan nudged his friend's knee sympathetically and smiled at him. Colin returned his grin with a watery one of his own. Ryan knew from years of experience that Colin was getting in a bad way, and even though he would deny emphatically, he also knew when his friend would reach his limits. It was happening now.
Drew announced the next game "Helping Hands" and while he was explaining how the game worked, Ryan perused tonight's offerings. It looked like another romantic date type situation, replete with a box of chocolates, (most of which he knew he wouldn't be able to stomach), different types of sauces in a bowl, cherries, and the ever popular whipped cream. Smiling to himself he rose and extended a hand to his friend, something he often didn't do, but always wondered why he did not. Colin put his hand into Ryan's hesitantly, but was strengthened by his reassuring grip. Ryan smoothed his thumb over Colin's knuckles briefly before pulling him to his feet.
Kathy Greenwood was already positioned in her spot, donning her harried, "I'm a whiny bitch" persona and stared impatiently as the two finally made their way to the front of the stage. Drew explained the scene which happened to be Ryan as an erotic party hostess, demonstrating her various products, which included a few of the batteries not included variety. Colin dutifully helped Ryan put on a stylish brown shoulder-length wig and red leather corset. Ryan groaned disparagingly as he allowed himself to be fitted in this get up. Colin put on a frilly little see-through nightie robe and shoved his arms through Ryan's in their familiar fashion. Colin stepped close to his friend and breathed him in. Ryan smelled particularly pleasing this evening, not that he didn't any other time they played this game. He loved the smell of Ryan's cologne. He caught himself just before he brushed his nose along his friend’s shoulder blades inhaling deeply once more. If only.
The game started off fast paced as usual, with Colin fumbling for things and Ryan speaking at 100wpm. Ryan demonstrated a few of the gadgets and gizmos with Kathy acting prim and shocked at the more suggestive of the items. Colin patted his hand around on the table and came up with something long and smooth and hard. 'No they did not just put one of these things on this table', he thought as he craned his head around to try and get a peek. The way Ryan halted in his rambling only confirmed that they had and he immediately released his hold on it, but not before the audience catching sight of it and letting out a loud gasp. It was immediately followed by a raucous uproar as Ryan nervously tried to play it off, and Colin's hands flailed on to something else.
Kathy prompted Ryan next into holding up a small box that held a heart-shaped necklace inside. Ryan went into a spiel about how it was Valentine's day and how nothing was more erotic than getting your lover some jewelry etc. etc. He spoke so eloquently on the subject that he had momentarily forgotten Colin's predicament and only when he felt something wet on his back did he come back to the realization that sometimes he could be an ass without realizing it. Colin's hand trembled as he tried to have a tighter grip on the necklace but his strength waned momentarily and he dropped it. He tried to stifle a sob into Ryan's back but his friend, felt and heard every agonizing second of it. Will this taping ever end? He was so anxious for the evening, he almost ruined things by wanting to throw a halt to the taping and whisk Colin away from his sadness, from his loneliness, from his brokenness.
Bringing things back into focus Ryan decided he needed to get Colin in a much better mood, before the entire evening was a write off. "Now here we have some bowls of various types of sauces, Ms. Hornay," the audience still giggling at the play on words. "You'll notice in this bowl we have a lovely chocolate sauce, not too sweet, and it can be used for many things in the bedroom, such as what I'm about to show you now. " Colin dipped his finger into the cool chocolate sauce and painted some down Ryan's long smooth nose. It felt velvety to the touch and Colin couldn't help but to rub it in circles in a downward pattern. Ryan nearly lost his train of thought at the touch and closed his eyes, pursing his lips seductively. Colin knew that his nose was one of his many erogenous zones. He shared most of his secrets with his friend and that one was no exception.
"You know it's always good to play with your food," he said to no one in particular, hoping that that someone understood what he meant. Colin took the remaining bits of chocolate sauce and brought it to Ryan's lips for a taste. Ryan opened his half -lidded eyes and gave Colin's finger an experimental lick. Colin's finger hesitated briefly on Ryan's bottom lip, ever so slightly brushing the chocolate sauce there, wanting Ryan to taste more. "I think I'll demonstrate some of the strawberry sauce now", Ryan said deliberately ignoring the waiting digit. Colin bit back a moan as he dipped is middle finger in the sauce bringing it back to Ryan's expectant mouth. Ryan knew he loved strawberries and just the scent alone was getting him very turned on. He had better put his feelings in check and soon.
It was not going to happen. Ryan saw the dripping, juicy finger coming to his parted lips and he wanted nothing more than to communicate what he had on his mind and what had been there for a long, long time, if only someone would open his eyes and see. "This, "he said slowly, almost dropping character "is how you turn your man on. You have to show him what he has in store for his romantic evening. Sometimes it's all in the visuals." Again, Ryan closed his eyes only this time he closed his mouth down over Colin's finger all the way to the bottom and sucked it up slowly. He shuddered at the taste of strawberries and Colin, and even more turned wobbly in the knees to hear Colin's gasp in response.
Colin had brought his other arm up and across Ryan's chest, holding him closer to his body, supporting him as well as being supported Ryan's tongue played all over his finger licking and sucking it slow. All the while the audience laughing uproariously at the "hilarity" of the scene. Kathy feigned getting turned on, but who wanted to watch that? Colin could barely remain conscious and he rested his forehead on his friends back, once again getting a nice strong whiff of his friends intoxicating scent. It sent him swooning somewhere over the rainbow. As Ryan felt a pair of soft lips feather lightly brush the nape of his neck, he looked to Drew at that moment, telling him with his eyes to end the game right now, or there would be a scene that even the blooper reel wouldn't take.
Colin mentally kicked himself over and over. What the hell had just happened tonight? Of all the messed up things he did, this had to take the cake. How could he even look at his friend again? Let alone look at him the same platonic way; he had for the past 20 years. What was the matter with him? He never felt lower than he did at this moment. How could he face Ryan again after the spectacle he made of himself? He should have known better, to keep those feelings, which were ultimately the ruination of his marriage to himself. No use dragging the stability of his friend into his screwed up life.
He approached his dressing room, just wanting to put this evening behind him, go home get drunk and pass out on the couch. He knew he had really crossed the line, when Ryan hadn't even bothered to stay around after the credits. He watched as his friend scurried off the stage and out the back door. Colin watched him go, as he watched Ryan do everything. His eyes always followed Ryan's form, tonight was certainly no exception. He opened the door to his dressing room and flicked on the light.
Almost instantaneously, he knew something was amiss. There was that familiar intoxicating scent he had smelled moments ago, but there was no body attached to it. He glanced down and saw a trail of rose petals leading into the room. A little quirky smirk crossed his features allowing his dimple to deepen on his cheek. He followed the trail of rose petals into the room, wondering where they would lead him. The trail stopped at his dressing table. He looked up and sitting on top of it was a bottle of champagne and a card, nothing more.
Colin's hands shook as he tried his best to open his card as meticulously as he was known for. Inside was a few more rose petals and a card reading, "meet me on the rooftop...come alone, and bring the refreshments....Ry" Colin brought the card to his nose inhaling deeply. Ryan was so thoughtful as to give the card another spray. Colin closed his eyes to the thought of Ryan's compassion. Just what exactly was going on here? He was confused, but he was going to find out. He grabbed the bottle and headed out the door and up the stairs to the rooftop.
Ryan waited impatiently for his friend. He was giddy with anticipation. Everything was just right. He had waited for this moment for over 2 years; he didn't know why he had refused to allow himself to believe his feelings long ago. He had lived a life of misery and longing for something he didn't think he deserved to have. Colin was in a class above the rest. He didn't go for Ryan's crudeness at times and he didn't go for Ryan's arrogance at others. But he completed Ryan and Ryan knew it. He found himself changing in many ways for the better from knowing his long-time Canadian friend. He wanted to prove to Colin that their friendship meant the world and so much more to him.
Colin approached the door to the rooftop slowly. A familiar tune could be heard playing on the other side of the door. Ryan knew how much Colin loved the contemporary standards. It was a gesture that Colin found most endearing. He rested his hand on the knob and listened for a moment.
"There’s a saying old, says that love is blind. Still were often told seek and ye shall find. So I’m going to seek a certain lad in mind. Looking every where, haven’t found him yet. He’s the big affair, I cannot forget. The only man I ever think of with regret."
Colin opened the door to a loverly scene. It was the only way he could describe it. There were strung up Christmas lights twinkling everywhere, creating a starlight atmosphere. A soft gentle breeze caressed the wisps of hair at the top of his head. There was a table set up in the corner that had a wrapped gift on it, as well as 2 dozen roses of every color variety and a bucket beside the table filled with ice expectantly waiting for the bottle sweating in Colin’s hand.
I’d like to add his initial to my monogram…tell me where is the shepherd for this lost lamb?
Colin saw him with his back turned standing at the rooftop edge. It was Ryan in a tux. He was absolutely gorgeous from this angle, Colin mused. Long, tall and slender, all dressed in black. Casually, propped as if waiting for someone to arrive and so calm, cool and collected in the process. Colin watched the thin line of smoke trail a circle around his head as he languidly took another drag. He flicked it over the edge and turned to face Colin.
Is there somebody I’m longing to see? I hope that he, turns out to be, someone to watch over me. I’m a little lamb who’s lost in the wood. I know I could always be good, to one, who’ll watch over me.
Ryan approached Colin wordlessly and removed the bottle of champagne forgotten in Colin’s hand and placed it, in the bucket. Colin’s mouth was agape, drinking in the damn sexiness of the man before him. His green eyes sparkled with the hazy glow of the twinkling lights, showed merriment as well as abounding love and admiration for the man that was looking at him in utter amazement. Colin followed his fluid movements as Ryan gathered him into his arms and whispered into his hair. "Dance with me."
Although he may not be the man some girls think of as handsome, to my heart, he carries the key. Ryan pulled back and looked directly into Colin’s eyes as the words were sung. Colin melted away on the spot. A little tear formed and Ryan reached up and brushed it away. Colin returned to Ryan’s arms, burying his face in his chest, hugging Ryan closer to him, and swayed to the music. He breathed in everything that was Ryan and refused to let him go, after all he was a romantic at heart, and this he knew was where his heart belonged.
Won’t you tell him please to put on some speed, follow my lead, oh how I need someone to watch over meeee. Ryan actually dipped him and brought him back. Someone to watch…over….me.
"I love you Colin", Ryan said as he brought his friend close. Their noses touching. Ryan’s breath whispering over Colin’s lips. He watched as his friend’s eyes closed to the words, savoring them, locking them in his heart.
"I love you Ryan", Colin repeated, bringing their lips together sealing their destiny. "Thank you."